


Love You Till The End

by Laurasauras



Category: Homestuck
Genre: Earth C (Homestuck), F/F, Marriage Proposal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-06
Updated: 2020-04-06
Packaged: 2021-03-02 04:40:48
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,259
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23519362
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Laurasauras/pseuds/Laurasauras
Summary: Rose proposes to Kanaya.
Relationships: Rose Lalonde/Kanaya Maryam
Comments: 10
Kudos: 53





	Love You Till The End

**Author's Note:**

  * For [caledfwlchthat](https://archiveofourown.org/users/caledfwlchthat/gifts).



> Happy birthday Cal! Your friendship, company and endless enthusiasm are so precious to me. I'm so lucky I get to hang out with you! <3
> 
> Title taken from the [song of the same name by The Pogues.](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mjtzdummdCA)

Dave and Rose have been sitting in silence since Rose dropped her bombshell. Dave likes to take time to process things. Rose knows not to push him yet, even though it’s so tempting to run circles of self-justification around him. She also doesn’t want to give the impression that she isn’t completely composed.

DAVE: you know youre 16 right  
ROSE: Nearly 17.  
DAVE: wow  
DAVE: watch out world  
DAVE: here comes rose and she is 16 and ¾  
DAVE: shes got a big girl purse just like mommy and her bedtime is *8*  
DAVE: next year she goes to big school and shes gonna be a firefighter when she grows up  
DAVE: shes gonna be so good that there will be no more fires  
DAVE: thats right folks shes gonna cure fires  
DAVE: shes still gonna use the firepole though like thats half the reason shes taking the position to begin with  
DAVE: why else would you even be a firefighter what to save lives dont worry about it rose lalonde cured fires anyway  
ROSE: I _mean_ that if I do go through with it, the ceremony will likely take place when we are 17.  
DAVE: uhuh

Silence resumes. Neither of them look at each other, the word “ceremony” hanging in the air like a sunbeam full of dust, dancing in circles around itself and difficult to look away from now that they’ve noticed it.

DAVE: why are you telling me anyway  
DAVE: since when does my opinion on anything have an effect on whether you do something  
DAVE: are you asking me for my blessing?  
DAVE: because thats weird im not kanayas dad  
DAVE: shed be a great daughter but you know thats not really the relationship dynamic we have going on  
ROSE: I’m asking your opinion.  
ROSE: Or, I don’t know...  
ROSE: I’m quite confident in this, I wouldn’t bring it up if I wasn’t.   
ROSE: But, like you say, we’re young.   
ROSE: And I’ve never actually seen a healthy adult relationship, let alone a marriage, so I don’t really know why it’s important to me, but it is for some reason.  
DAVE: well yeah i mean just because we werent around weddings non stop doesnt mean were not gonna think about what ours are gonna be like in the future right  
ROSE: This is actually the first I’ve given it much thought.   
ROSE: How _did_ you imagine yours when you were a little boy dreaming of the day an angry troll would sweep you off your feet?  
DAVE: ok first of all it would be me doing the sweeping thank you  
DAVE: wait no  
DAVE: *actually* first of all is that karkat and i arent a thing so shut your damn mouth  
DAVE: second of all im the sweeper  
DAVE: third of all its not like i made a fucking collage or a moodboard or whatever it is that you do with the glitter and the wedding planning  
DAVE: i just thought itd be nice to get dressed up all fancy and at the end of it you have a legally binding document that you are family with your favourite girl  
DAVE: or dude cause you know i swing both ways now  
ROSE: You’ve mentioned.   
DAVE: cool just wanted to make sure you knew

Rose looks down at Dave’s shirt. It has pink, purple and blue stripes across it, clearly done at home and while he was wearing it. There’s blue paint on his arm. He proclaimed it his gay arm when Rose noticed it earlier, and made a rude gesture with it to illustrate his point.

ROSE: I was hoping you’d planned specifics.  
DAVE: oh i DID  
DAVE: it was gonna be at the swimming pool right because that was easy the best place id ever been  
DAVE: we were gonna hire a van so that bros dj equipment would be there and hed mix the sickest beats ever just the whole time  
DAVE: ceremony afterparty all of it even after everyone went home hed still be there jamming  
DAVE: john and i were gonna wear matching tuxs and you and jade were gonna wear the most hideous 80s prom dresses like the big floofy bows and everything  
DAVE: and after we said i do we wouldnt even kiss wed just all jump into the pool like in a movie when one person jumps in a pool and everyone else jumps in and no one is scared that anyone is going to land on them for some reason its just fun

Dave stares off into space, a few pixels of smile breaking onto his face.

ROSE: That’s very sweet.  
DAVE: ikr  
DAVE: how does yours go down  
ROSE: I told you, I never planned it.  
DAVE: dude no  
DAVE: how does it go down now just chuck it at me what are your base thoughts

Rose looks down at her hands. She still isn’t sure she’s sold on marriage. She definitely isn’t doing this out of an attempt to conform to society. She doesn’t have the excuse of being fresh out of a battle, riding high on victory and needing to proclaim her love or stake her claim or whatever reason people have for doing it in the movies. 

She just wants it. Maybe she wants to feel connected with the culture she grew up with, or the one she was born into and never really got to know that well. Maybe she wants the undeniable proof that Kanaya envisions their lives together lasting indefinitely. It’s not really a feeling that comes with an identifiable source.

ROSE: Outside.  
ROSE: Kanaya loves being outside, we could get married in the sun.  
ROSE: Maybe in a garden, that’s a thing people do.   
ROSE: I don’t know…  
DAVE: nah thats great  
DAVE: i can totally see it  
ROSE: Do you think I’m crazy for wanting to do this?  
DAVE: i *know* youre crazy for so many reasons  
DAVE: this isnt one of them

Rose hits the back of Dave’s hand lightly and then leaves hers over his. He reaches up with a thumb to give her hand a quick stroke, acknowledging the gesture as much as either of them can bear.

DAVE: do you have a ring?

Rose picks the small velvet box from her sylladex and opens it for Dave’s inspection. He takes the ring out so he can see better. It’s a small diamond, with the filagree on the side swirling like vines to hold it in place. Dave whistles lowly and carefully puts it back in the box.

DAVE: shes gonna say yes  
ROSE: Let’s not make assumptions.   
DAVE: of course shes gonna say yes  
DAVE: wheres your pride  
DAVE: youve literally never doubted yourself once and also your superpower is luck  
DAVE: or was that just vriska  
DAVE: anyway the point is duh theres no doubt  
DAVE: she loves the shit out of you  
ROSE: I know that.

They sit together a bit longer before Dave asks the obvious question.

DAVE: so howre you gonna do it  
ROSE: I have no fucking idea.

*

Rose’s hands are shaking as she double checks the picnic basket. She captchalogues it and presses her hands to her waist to still them. It shouldn’t be this big of a deal. Over the last three months, Rose has casually brought up the subject of marriage, her and Kanaya’s long-term relationship prospects, and jewelry colour preferences. She could not be more certain. And yet, she’s more nervous than she’s ever been in her life.

They drive most of the way there, because Kanaya feels self-conscious being flown about by Rose for too long. But eventually they pull over and Rose scoops Kanaya into her arms. Kanaya nuzzles her affectionately on her neck and then keeps still, because even though Rose has supernatural strength, she would never want to be an inconvenience. 

They land the same place they did 5000 years ago, though they have to fight through a lot of vegetation that wasn’t there last time. The entrance Rose chooses is close to their old common area. They walk past Dave and Karkat’s penis hopscotch and finally up the stairs to where Rose’s slipper still rests. It hasn’t been blemished by time, though by all rights it should have. But it belonged to a god and was alchemised through Sburb. 

Rose decaptchalogues the picnic basket and gives it to Kanaya to hold so that she can retrieve the thick blanket they’ll sit on, on a platform only a few steps above her old slipper. She takes out candles and starts to light them.

KANAYA: I Had My Doubts That We Could Even Find This Place  
KANAYA: But Youre Right Its Lovely  
ROSE: I think you should be quite accustomed to me being right.  
KANAYA: It Is A Rather Unfortunate Quality Of Yours Yes

Rose pauses in her unpacking to kiss Kanaya’s smiling lips. The picnic doesn’t take long to set up, and Rose keeps sneaking looks to assess whether Kanaya suspects anything. She very clearly doesn’t. Does she really think this is just another activity?

KANAYA: The Mother Grub Is Due To Go Into Pupation Again Next Week  
ROSE: Could we perhaps not do work talk right now?  
KANAYA: Oh Of Course  
KANAYA: I Know What We Can Talk About Instead  
KANAYA: Karkat Was Telling Me About A Movie That I Think Youll Get A Kick Out Of

Rose’s breath leaves her lungs as she realises that Kanaya _really_ doesn’t suspect anything. How do people just start proposing? How does one wait for the right pause in conversation?!

KANAYA: And Then The Real Twist Is That They Were Human All Along  
ROSE: You don’t say.  
KANAYA: Of Course I Dont Want To Watch It  
KANAYA: I Assume You Dont Either Though If You Do Then Im Sorry For Spoiling It  
ROSE: I don’t want to watch it.  
KANAYA: Okay Good  
KANAYA: Oh And Then The Dog Gets Up To Some Hijinks Did I Mention A Dog  
ROSE: I don’t think so?

Kanaya genuinely doesn’t see the tension Rose feels. The worst part is that Rose is now completely thrown off balance and she can’t remember a word of her speech. She remembers reading over it in the bathroom before they left and it was so perfect. She’d struck the balance between romantic and true to her style of speech, while also not going for so long she couldn’t remember it. Except that now she can’t. 

Good _lord,_ this has to be the chattiest Kanaya has ever been in the history of her entire life.

KANAYA: The Funny Thing About Karkats Recommendations Is That He Is So Very Specific In His Tastes And Some Of His Movies Arent Even That Bad  
KANAYA: But Its Not Good Taste At All  
KANAYA: I Feel Like You Rarely See Someone Who Has Taste So Refined In The Wrong Direction  
ROSE: Mm!  
KANAYA: (Are You Okay?)  
KANAYA: (You Havent Touched Your Meat Enclosed Bread Meal)  
ROSE: I’m just not quite hungry.  
ROSE: Actually, there was something I was meaning to say. 

Kanaya looks at Rose curiously. Rose stares wide-eyed back, reaching for the beginning of her speech and finding nothing. The pause drags on roughly a million years. Or, more accurately, about four seconds.

ROSE: I knew you were special from our very first conversations.  
KANAYA: As Did I

There’s another, quite brief pause, and Kanaya interprets it as Rose being finished.

KANAYA: I Was Thinking Of Rearranging Our Living Room  
ROSE: Actually, one more thing.

Kanaya smiles apologetically and is quiet again.

ROSE: I…

She can’t speak! That’s her one thing! She talks a lot and smiles mysteriously!

ROSE: You see,

Where was that sentence going, Rose? What does Kanaya see? The impossibilities of speech grow ever larger. Kanaya’s expression grows more serious, as she begins to finally realise that this isn’t an everyday kind of picnic to the site of their first date.

ROSE: I have a question.

Rose’s voice sounds very strangled. In the movies, she thinks spitefully, the actors always speak so perfectly. Like they’re being force-fed lemon tea and spoonfuls of honey between each take. Show business is a _sick_ industry.

KANAYA: Perhaps You Had Better Just Ask It

Yes. Okay. Time to do that. Finally, Kanaya knows what Rose is doing. Rose plucks the ring from her sylladex. When she speaks again, it’s a whisper. It’s the only thing to say.

ROSE: Will you marry me?

Kanaya doesn’t even look at the box, she just starts nodding immediately. There are tears welling up in her eyes when she replies, sounding equally as emotional.

KANAYA: Yes

Rose lets out a choked laugh and manages to get the ring on Kanaya’s finger with only minimal shakiness. Well, that’s not exactly true, but for dignity’s sake we will omit the fact that Rose completely lost all fine motor skills and let them have this moment.

They reach for each other, their picnic forgotten. Kanaya kisses Rose so violently that a candle is knocked over, and they only glance up to make sure that their blanket hasn’t caught fire before continuing their kiss. 

When they regain their composure, they lie on their backs and hold hands as they talk.

ROSE: It isn’t the wedding, though I think that will be a lovely day.  
ROSE: I want to have a marriage with you, I want to call you wife, to be a family.  
KANAYA: I Am So Very Honoured  
KANAYA: You Know We Didnt Have Weddings On Alternia  
KANAYA: The Fact That Trolls Were Incapable Of The Kind Of Commitment They Require Was An Integral Part Of Our Media  
KANAYA: A Love Story Would Be Entirely Perfect And Yet It Could Never Last  
KANAYA: That Was One Of The Reasons The Story Of The Signless Was So Radical  
KANAYA: As Youve Shown Me…  
KANAYA: Were Not Mindless Rage Creatures By Default  
KANAYA: We  
KANAYA: _I_  
KANAYA: Am Capable Of Such Love  
KANAYA: I Would Gladly Spend My Entire Life With You  
KANAYA: Preferably Extended By Our Circumstances To A Frankly Unpractical Number Of Years  
KANAYA: It Doesnt Daunt Me At All  
KANAYA: And I Relish The Opportunity To Say So Very Loudly

Rose thumbs Kanaya’s new ring so that it’s straight again. It may need to be slightly resized.

ROSE: I never thought I was capable of it either.   
ROSE: My mom wanted it for me, and knowing that she knew the game was coming recontextualises some things on that front.   
ROSE: She didn’t seem optimistic, though she was working to help us.  
ROSE: She would get very emotional and very drunk while telling me how beautiful I would be as a bride.   
KANAYA: You Will Be A Very Beautiful Bride  
KANAYA: You Simply Cannot Help It

Rose brings Kanaya’s hand up to her lips to kiss it, smiling at her with just an edge of scolding. It’s _her_ turn to be romantic, but Kanaya can’t turn it off. Besides, Rose is more confident complimenting herself with enough wryness to pass it as ironic, it’s more difficult to accept such perfect sincerity.

ROSE: _Anyway._  
ROSE: I can’t believe how hard that was. I’ve never been more nervous in my life.  
KANAYA: How Could My Acceptance Be In Doubt  
ROSE: It wasn’t, not really.  
ROSE: I couldn’t even do my speech.  
KANAYA: You Could Do It Now

Rose laughs, but Kanaya is perfectly serious. So, after fidgeting a little with self-conscious indecision, Rose takes her phone from her sylladex and begins to read from it.

ROSE: Kanaya.  
KANAYA: A Classic Beginning  
ROSE: Shh!  
KANAYA: I Cannot Believe My Fiancee Is Shushing Me On The Day Of Our Engagement

Rose rolls her eyes. She feels somewhat more relaxed, though. Kanaya really is brilliant.

ROSE: From our very first conversations, tragically not choreographed so that they could occur simultaneously, I knew you were special.   
ROSE: You dazzled me with your wit and your combativeness, as well as with the way you looked out for me almost from the outset. While being a complete bitch, of course.  
KANAYA: You Were Like A Muse In That Regard  
KANAYA: Never Am I Provoked To Such Bitchy Heights As With You  
ROSE: Likewise.  
ROSE: I don’t need to recap our relationship, as you were there for it,  
KANAYA: You Did In An Earlier Draft I Assume  
ROSE: Yes, and I pared this one back.  
ROSE: Though perhaps not as much as I needed to. I anticipated neither snark nor horseshit in between my proposal. 

Rose refocuses on her phone. Kanaya scoots closer so she can kiss Rose’s cheek and Rose smiles happily.

ROSE: We have something so special.  
ROSE: I’ve never felt comfortable like this with anyone else. Never wanted every part of someone so completely as I want you.  
ROSE: It takes no thought at all to tell you I love you every day.   
ROSE: We’ve been through hell, through battle and intolerable waiting and Vriska.  
ROSE: And we made a paradise in the middle of it. Seeing you made every second beautiful.  
ROSE: And now, in a real paradise, you are real.  
ROSE: Every day, you take the concept of eternity and you render it irrelevant, because what is eternity compared to a quiet half an hour with you?  
ROSE: The expanse of forever could swallow me, but I don’t even glance at it because you are so much brighter.  
ROSE: And you’re a truly excellent fuck.

Kanaya laughs brokenly, emotionally. Rose looks away from her phone to smile at her. It is simply wondrous that her words could communicate even a fraction of her feelings, but somehow they are.

ROSE: I want to entwine you with the concept of always.  
ROSE: I want to discover habits in you that drive me crazy, and quirks that make me fall in love again.  
ROSE: I want to be perpetually baffled by the fact that you wake up early naturally, and to know how lucky I am to have someone to drag me to bed.   
ROSE: I want to know that you will not just endure, but enjoy my lengthy speeches. To feel secure in your attention.  
ROSE: I want to see, through your eyes, the beauty the world holds. I never seemed to notice it before.  
ROSE: I want to love you every single day.  
ROSE: To feel that I do it well.  
ROSE: To feel that it’s enough.

Rose swallows and looks up at Kanaya again. She strokes the faint green blush on her new fiancee’s cheek and finds the memory of the words returning. She doesn’t need her phone for this last bit.

ROSE: It’s human and it’s flawed, it’s both meaningless and the most important thing I will ever do, it has infinite history and it is all ours, only ours.  
ROSE: Please,  
ROSE: Be my wife.

Kanaya holds Rose’s hand to her cheek and smiles.

KANAYA: I Have Already Said Yes But I Gladly Do Again  
KANAYA: Rose  
KANAYA: That Was Very Beautiful

She looks down self-consciously.

KANAYA: Would You Grant Me Some Time To Compose Something Before I Respond?  
ROSE: Respond?  
KANAYA: My Love I Cannot Leave Your Hand Unadorned  
KANAYA: And I Have One Or Two Pretty Things To Say About You As Well  
ROSE: Oh.  
ROSE: I would love to receive a proposal from you as well.  
ROSE: That is actually an excellent first step in the process.  
KANAYA: The Process?  
ROSE: I intend on divorcing all the patriarchal talons from the celebration of our love that I can.  
KANAYA: I Love You So Much

**Author's Note:**

> I have to admit that this bears significant resemblance to me proposing to my husband, who thought nothing of me organising a weekend away and making a blanket fort even though I'd sussed out that he thought women proposing was a good idea and that we were both on team marriage over the preceding months. He straight up would not stop talking! Luckily for both Rose and I, persistence paid off.


End file.
